Friday, August 22, 2014

Conversations with Three Year-Olds



The boys have started listening to conversations that they are not a part of which is a huge pain, since they were previously pretty oblivious to everything not spoken directly to them. We could discuss Christmas presents, secretly-pregnant friends, and possible plans to visit the P-A-R-K.
But no longer. The boys now listen to conversations that aren't about them, and assume that whatever we are saying is about their dad. So if someone in the front seat says, "I'm starving."
Someone in the back seat  will immediately pipe up, "My dad is STARVING? That's why he eats bugs?" (Travis ate some bugs in Ghana. It's a pretty big deal around here.)
They don't always catch what we're talking about either, so I also hear lots of random things like, "My Dad is pooping in a river, Mom?" or "My dad is Grandpa's Dad and he is waiting for us at our home?"
No and No.

Travis: We have to get new tires.
Grey: Oh yeah? Why?
Travis: Because somebody likes to mess with my head and wallet.
Grey: We do, Dad! We do!

Grey: Grandpa Chris is Grandma's daddy?
Me: No, Grandpa is Grandma's husband. They're married. Grandpa Chris is MY daddy.
Grey: Oh I see.
Me: Ah, yes. I see.
Grey: No. You don't see. I see.

Travis: Have you pooped yet?
Micah: No. He likes him home.
Travis: What? Who does? Your poop?
Micah: Yeah. My poop likes him home inside me.

Grey: Why did Grandpa Jim die? I know. His teeth fell out and he had fake ones and then he died.

Micah: You think I can't climb trees because I'm little? Ha! No! I can climb all the little trees!

Micah: Hey. I am alone AGAIN!

**August threw up**
Katie: EEEEWWWW!
Grey: Excuse me! Babies throw up a lot Katie, so you don't have to say that.

Micah: I need to take my temperature. Ah. It's an 8.

Me: Is it more important to be right or to be nice?
Grey: Right!
Me: Wrong!
Grey: NICE!
Micah: WRONG!
Grey: NIIIICE!
Micah: I changed my mind.
Me: What did you change your mind to?
Micah: I changed my mind, to TRICK YOU!

Micah: Grandma is stupid.
Me: Hey! That is not okay to say, stupid is a really naughty word.
Micah: But, I still love her anyway!

Micah: Mom, this is a flying motorcycle. That's not a flying baby.

Micah: I want to see August!
Grey: You totally can!
Micah: I can NOT!
Grey: Hmm. Are your eyes broken?

Micah: Thanks, Me! Ha! I said Thank you to myself!

Micah: Where's Grandma?
Me: Outside.
Micah: How DARE her go outside?!

Grey: Will Katie and Grandma drink my smoothie?
Me: No. They'll save it for you.
Grey: So no bad guys drink it?
Me: There aren't any bad guys who want to drink your smoothie.
Micah: I could fight them!
Grey: No! You'll die!  You're not a grownup!
Me: Micah can fight pretend bad guys, Grey.
Micah: I can fight pretend bad guys!
Grey: Well, do it then!
Micah: They're not here. They are at Grandma Polly's house, drinking you smoothie.
Grey: NOOO!

Grandma: We can see the temple from up here.
Micah: I love to see the temple!
Me: Me too!
Micah: You do not. And you do not get to see the temple with us. We are dropping you off somewhere else.

Micah: I like kisses from Grandma Polly. I do not like kisses from Grandpa.

Me: You better keep that sassy tongue in your mouth.
Grey: I wasn't sticking my tongue out at you. I was sticking it at the grass.

Grey: Grandpa Chris is not cute. I am cute, and you are cute, Micah. But Grandpa Chris is not cute. 
Katie: Grandpa is cute!
Micah: No, Katie. He is NOT cute. Grandma Polly is cute, and you are cute. Grey is cute and I am cute. 
Grey: But Grandpa is not cute. 

Micah: A shark is going to eat me!
Me: Oh no! Are you alright?
Micah: No. I am NOT. I'm a shark's BELLY!



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1 comment:

MARCIE said...

A good week of wonky wanderings! I especially like about Grandpa Jim's teeth. Guess what? I still have them!