a butternut squash or two

I get an email every week from BabyCenter.com titled "Your Pregnancy at [insert number] weeks!"

This week, my 29th, the email said "Your baby is growing rapidly now. This week he weighs about 2 1/2 pounds (like a butternut squash) and is a tad over 15 inches long from head to heel."

 Excuse me?
HAVE YOU SEEN BUTTERNUT SQUASH? We have two butternut squash sitting on our kitchen table right now.
I went to pick them up and see how I felt about butternut squash sized children in my belly.

They are huge. Maybe these squash are bigger than the average squash (they are from the farmer's market. We have had them for months because we stocked up on winter squash- which last forever.)
But I can't imagine regular butternut squash are much smaller.

We had a check up last week and I have officially gained 20lbs since my pregnancy began.
These babies have reached the size where you can see them moving through my skin.
We tried to film it, but you'll have to wait for better footage.
Sometimes it's a little like a marble whizzing back and forth under my skin, and then there are tremors and ripples across my belly where they kick hard, like water in a glass when someone heavy is walking nearby, and most often my belly contorts and changes its entire shape as a baby sticks his head or butt in a new place, like my ribs or on my bladder.

We're talking about freaky aliens trying to escape the confines of my little belly.
It's freaky. It's kind of gross. It's a little like the Mummy when the beetle gets under the skin and crawls around.
But mostly it's awesome.
Except at 4 am when they kick so hard and so often that I can't stay asleep.

Then it's annoying.

But right now its happening. Seriously, like a little marble rolling around under my thin skin.