We talk like this:
Becky: I love you.
Travis: How much?
Becky: Um, one billion.
Becky: Yep. One Billion Love Units.
Travis: So I'm a Billionaire.
Becky: Just a Love Billionaire.
Becky: I have a question for the Love Billionaire.
Travis: Yes, I'm now taking questions.
Becky: How does it feel to be so rich?
Travis: Well, you just try to live day to day, like any normal person. That's all you can do. The difference of course is that I'm better than normal people.
Becky: Haven't you heard the expression, "Can't buy me love?"
Travis: *scoffs* What do the Beatles know about love? They were just Love Millionaires. Being a Love Billionaire means I can afford things like a super hot wife and twins.
Becky: You're very lucky.
Travis: I like to say, "Can't love me buy."
Becky: So wise.
Travis: or, I say "Can't you me you love."
Becky: That makes less sense.
Travis: Just put it in your freaking article. Of course you don't understand it. Are you a Love Billionaire?
Becky: I guess not. But I sure love you.
Travis: That's just another Love Unit. Love-Money in the bank.
Man. Our kids are sure lucky to have such cool parents.
And to be the sons of a Love Billionaire.
Oh, and Happy Ides of March.