Friday, December 19, 2014

Conversations with Three-Year Olds

This week, when I decided to roll up my sleeves and clean the oven (for the first time since we've lived here.... um, in the last almost-three years), there was immediately a spark, smoke, and the boys ran screaming from the room where Grey yelled, "This is why Moms should never clean ovens!" When I said, "Oh, calm down. I can fix this." He yelled, "No! Call my dad right now!"
And when I did finally pick up the phone, he said, "Who are you calling? Dad? Wendell? They can use their tools to fix the oven!"
(Wendell is our property manager. We apparently know him well.)

A friend came over and after her baby had a particularly stinky diaper, the diaper was set outside to be taken to the trash. It was forgotten. The next day when we came home, Micah saw it sitting on the step and yelled, "Oh! We got a diaper package!"

Micah: I don't want you to go to jail, Mom. You are the good girl in the whole wide world.

Grey: Eli is fat like Santa!

Santa: Why, hello! What's your name?
Micah: I'm Micah David Pitcher. I'm three. A real bow and arrow.

Grey: Hey James, I have an idea. Maybe you should go to your own house to be crazy.

Micah: I don't want to poop, but there's a big poop in me and it's trying to get out.

Micah: August is an alien and a half.

Travis: these people are bad parkers.
Grey: You mean, they are blockheads?

Micah: Wendell, you are pretty big- but not big like my dad. He's really big.
Grey: but not big like a giant.
Micah: He IS big like a giant.

Micah: I want to throw away our Christmas tree!
Me: Well, we are going to keep it until Christmas, but then we will get rid of it.
Micah: NO! Then we can't have family night!

Micah: Our Christmas tree smells cutie!

Grey: Hey! Want to hear the longest-ever song I ever singed? Bum, bum, bum! Here I go!

Micah: Uh oh! It's late o'clock!

Grey: Neener Neener, Cutie-pootie.
Ha! Pootie is a good name for babies.

Grey: Mom, you are so pretty all the time.
Micah: I'm not your mom.
Grey: I know. I wasn't talking to you. I was talking to her, over there on the red couch.

Grey: It would be really sad if our house was on fire.
Elanor: And all our toys burned up!
Micah: And we had to live outside!
Grey: With no food and no water!
Micah: We would starve!
Grey: We would die!
Micah: and THAT is why we need to be very careful lighting candles in the house.

Micah: Quick, Grey! Catch Grandma Polly before she floats away into space!
Grey: I got her, but I can't pull her back! She's too fat!
Me: Hey, did you just say that your grandma is fat?
Grey: Yes, but don't worry. Not fat like Santa!

Me: What should we eat for dinner?
Micah: Let's go to a cake restaurant!

Micah: What are you making?
Me: Soup!
Micah: Oh great, because I LOVE soup! Does it have carrots in it?
Me: Nope, those are sweet potatoes.
Grey: Ugh! Bad choice! Haha, just kidding. That sounds okay.

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1 comment:

MARCIE said...

They are so funny! Their conversations always crack me up.